I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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