She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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