This is not my ceiling
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
