my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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