I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
