i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
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