Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
