So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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