Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
God, I missed his penis.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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