Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize