porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Randomize
