he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
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