Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
