So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize