Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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