I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
