Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize