It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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