David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize
