frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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