i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Randomize
