A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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