We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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