My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize