yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
