areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
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