the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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