What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
