That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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