Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
