so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
