kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
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