What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Please don't give away my fajitas
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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