he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
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