dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
