it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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