will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
