Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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