Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
