New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
