Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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