Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize