He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
