Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Randomize
