For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
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