Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
