I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Randomize