wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Rumble strips road head = magical
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
The uberlube is also flammable
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
