I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
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