He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
