shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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