Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
